This Week at The Grove: Arsène Crowned “God”. £30m?

If it was at another team, the past week would rank as quite dramatic but at London Colney… the Emirates Stadium… that red side of north London… some place where you’ll find the statue of a king celebrating from the great ol’ days, it’s been business as usual.

What gooner isn’t by now accustomed to the unnecessary heart-racing moments generously provided by Arsenal FC? First serving of the last week came courtesy of Laurent Koscielny, head like a cockerel, hauling Edin Dzeko down from the snares of unseen demons that were about to devour the Bosnian.

Inevitably, City went home with all three points while we only had the consolation of a stellar Jack Wilshere performance along with Vincent Kompany’s straight red later in the game. By Monday however, we only had Wilshere’s performance as consolation.

By Tuesday, in case there was any doubt lingering about his status at the club, Wojciech he-whose-name-we-once-couldn’t-spell Szczesny (take note now if you still can’t spell it) reaffirmed monsieur Wenger’s place at the club, of course as god!

Much as I’d have loved to dwell on that, we had a replay to prepare for, with Michu and the Swang coming to town, looking to end the god’s unbeaten run in FA Cup third round matches.

Typical Arsenal, having most of the ball but ultimately achieving nothing with it until the 86th minute when Jack ‘future club captain with heart of three Simbas and a cub’ Wilshere volleyed home from 20 yards out to put us through to the fourth round where we will face Newcastle United’s humble-pie waiters Brighton & Hove-Albion. Don’t order one Arsenal.

In that win over Swansea, Francis Coquelin once more showed why Wenger should have a bit more faith in his countryman rather than play Mikel Arteta – who we now must live without for some weeks – out of position and starve all Categories of gooners of the creative midfielder he really is.

If god Wenger ever obliged us with a 4-4-2 starting line-up, Arteta could start in right midfield with iPod on the other side and Wilshere in the middle with Cazorla. Or Wilshere and Arteta swapping those positions throughout a match as the god started the season with the forwards.

But since he is too stubborn, despite his youth, to heed to the pleas of mere mortals that we are, why not sign a proper defensive midfielder? One who will tidy things up even better than Arteta has managed to do most times so far.

Perhaps Yann M’Vila? Stale matter, for we don’t do dudes with attitude. I’m sure as Torres being a flop at the chavs that Zlatan still sees us as a club full of primadonnas as he did Freddy Ljungberg (in his book) during Euro 2000.

Also, the god felt the club had a good squad so indeed, why sign a proper defensive midfielder or any proper player in another position?

Hold that thought… according to GeoffArsenal, a tweeter knowledgeable of the club’s dealings to an extent, tweeted that the club had lodged a bid of £30m for a player. Who? He didn’t say.

Before you could type “COYG!” and tweet, our dear club had been linked to none other than Edinson Cavani, that beastly free scoring Uruguayan who remains Di Laurentis’ prime figure in a non-erotic fantasy he is aiming at with his club Napoli.

Wenger fuelled the speculation further with his admiration of the lethal striker who only signed a contract extension at the start of this season which keeps him at Napoli till 2017.

But as PSG showed the world with the signing of Thiago Silva, no player is beyond getting. So…

“Who Are We?!” “GOONERS!” “Who do we want?!?” “CAVANI!!!” “When do we want him?!?!” “NOW!!!”

This is coming not long after another striker on a lavenous streak, Radamel Falcao, thought the PSG project was an enticing one he wouldn’t mind being a part of.

‘Not that he’d like to go now, it just seems such an ambitious project’. So…

“Who Are We?!” “GOONERS!” “Who do we want?!?” “FALCAO!!!” “When do we want him?!?!” “NOW!!!”

On that motivational note, it’s a wrap with this pseudo round-up of Arsenal in the last week as inspired by such posts you would find here.

This weekend, we await the “sign da ting” jingle to finally get closure while we prepare to face the chavs in a Premier League match.

Ahead of that, Wenger expressed his surprise at Pep Guardiola’s move to Bayern. Perhaps, god of The Grove, he is doing you a favour by not choosing the EPL?

And… apparently our people watched Mohamed Diame in West Ham’s FA Cup replay at the Red Devils. Will the god be bothered to activate the £3.5m release clause in his contract? Mere mortals await.

Enjoy your Friday wherever this post meets you.

Until Tomorrow.